My grandmother gave me some helpful advice this morning. She usually does. She is a fountain of wisdom, a source of strength in my life. We spoke on the phone for a while today, longer than usual. She sounded happy, and hopeful. If there comes a day when everything is wrong, Sandy puts a positive spin on the situation. God listens to her prayers, and God answers.
I have expressed my love and gratitude for my adopted grandmother, but she is worthy of much more. I would like to share a bit about our relationship.
When I was sixteen, I was helping with Vacation Bible School at my church. In the life of a preacher’s kid, I have often been roped into volunteer work. This year was special. My area of expertise is art, so I was assigned to the arts and crafts station. I wasn’t the sole leader. A wonderful, talented, energetic, fun, funny and endearing woman worked by my side. Over the course of the week, we spent quite some time getting to know each other. I learned that she didn’t have grandchildren. My grandparents live at a distance. I fell in love with Sandy, and asked her if she would be my grandmother. With tears in her eyes, she agreed to be adopted.
Over the years she watched me grow up, right by my side. Her house was located not far from mine in the Westcross Neighborhood, the distance of a one mile run and a halfway point before reaching home. I would often stop at her house for a “drink of water,” and that glass of water transformed into a soda, an ice cream sundae, and visits that lasted hours after the sunset.
If I had traveled by bicycle, my Grandaddy T would load the bike into their van and drive me home. If I ran to their house, though it was safe to run home, I also hitched a ride down the road to my house on Planter’s Lane.
I spent so much time hanging out with my grandma watching daytime television, shopping, walking and talking for hours. I vacationed at her house during the summer; when times were the hardest, I skipped school and hid out at her house where I felt safe, warm and loved. The feelings of dread and anxiety washed away with each moment I sat next to her. We have a close relationship to this day. Today her advice anchored me, tethering me to a reality that helps me face the truth without fear.
“When you fall, it’s not about how you fall. It’s about how you get up.”
Life is all about being positive and pulling through when times are hard. It is about leaving the negative feelings and triggers in your life behind, the reasons for your fall.
Give thanks for another day.
Help others.
Do something good.
Stay connected to people outside of your internet presence (six feet away and wearing a mask).
Take a deep breath.
Stay in the now.
Take nothing for granted.
Enjoy every moment.
I challenge you to enjoy every moment without trying to catch it on camera, and to limit your screen time.
In these times of anxiety and uncertainty, it is easy to lose track of time. Mornings turn to evenings so quickly. Time has confused us. It is slipping away as we prepare for what comes next, which is why it is so important to find ways to slow it down. Keep busy, stay productive, and do not take the special people in your life for granted. My life would not be the same without Sandy. I cherish her. She is a bright light in my life, and she glows brightest when I am in the dark. Her advice is sound, and I urge you to heed it.
—SJB